So in my last blog I talked about how I had my power shut off. Well come to find out I had to pay 437.00 to turn it back on and additional 360.00 deposit I was to say the least devastated. I'm pretty sure I said every curse word in the book (that poor lady :( ) I had to call the power company at least 10 times I had to go into work late and leave early it was awful. I eventually flipped out on my roommate and said I was qutting praxis 9. I had decided I was done the devil had won life had just gotten too hard. After a tough talk with my roommate she said "Sarah we are in a spot where our parents can help us isn't it better to learn now than down the road when we don't have any one that cant give us this money to cover it until we pay them back" I said yes but I wanted to take my extra money and save it incase I don't get a job its not fair. Why is my life is falling apart where is God? After a tough conversation I was told Sarah I'm shocked your throwing in the towel and saying God you are not big enough and your letting the devil win. Maybe your sitting here saying yes Sarah but you don't understand what im going though. Your right you know why because God will never give you more than you can handle. First of all I hate that saying its the worst but also biblical.....Sometimes I feel like God I cant do this but he says I can. Guess what I have at least 6000.00 in collection 1000.00 pending collection 4300.00 in debt 2000 left to pay with praxis 9, no job and my car desperately needs new parts. Guess what's even better God says Matthew 6:25-34 ESV “Therefore I tell you, do not be anxious about your life, what you will eat or what you will drink, nor about your body, what you will put on. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothing? Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they? And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. ... First convection its a sin to worry, also he tells us not to worry many times. I always like to think about it this way I have a puzzle piece in my hand God knows where it goes because he sees the whole picture; but im stubborn so I get anxious and try force it certain places and of course it doesn't fit. Often in life we look at the small piece of our life and say God where are you? Everything is falling apart are you there? Guess what because of this you can now relate to so many people now. He says in his word "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you." I will praise you in this storm. At the end of the day its just money, its just a job, its just fear that the devil has whispered in your ear. Im not perfect I cursed way too many people out today, I need to work on self control and the sin of doubting God but guess what He forgives you its okay he loves you even when you feel like hes not there he is.
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